Limp Fangs: The Adventures of Count Malt Liquela(1996)

After 450 years, he STILL can't get it up.

Limp Fangs: The Adventures of Count Malt Liquela is a comedy film set in the late 20th century. Count Malt Liquela, a 450-year-old vampire, prowls city streets in search of victims, but faces an unexpected obstacle: his fangs no longer work. The film follows the aging bloodsucker as he navigates the modern world while grappling with his fading supernatural abilities. What unfolds is a darkly humorous take on vampire mythology, blending horror tropes with comedic desperation. As Malt Liquela struggles to maintain his predatory lifestyle despite his physical limitations, the film explores themes of obsolescence and reinvention. The result is an irreverent parody that subverts classic creature-feature conventions while delivering absurdist humor rooted in the absurdity of an immortal being confronting mortality's indignities.